Strength Will Rise

My grandma is very sick. She went in last week for a routine, outpatient surgery. Because of her pain, she was kept overnight. And then again another night. On the third night she was transferred to the hospital. Her kidney function was shutting down because her body was unable to metabolize the pain medication. Yesterday, she seemed to be improving. 

I arrived at the hospital early this morning, hoping for a positive update from the doctor. Instead, I found my aunt crying at my grandma's bedside. She had taken a turn for the worse in the night, and was saying her goodbyes. The doctor let us know that they were trying strike a balance in treating her different organ systems. He was cautiously hopeful---he believed they could get the situation under control, but gently reminded us that she is 85. 

Throughout the morning, my grandma kept telling us all that she knew it was her time, that she had lived a good life, and that she was ready to be with Jesus. We were scared, because we felt like she was giving up. At one point, I was encouraging her to "think positively..." She looked at me, a bit surprised, and said, "I am! I'm going to Heaven! That's good, right?" 

This evening before we left the hospital we were given good news from the doctors that they are seeing slight improvements. Grandma is no longer talking as if she is going to pass on immediately, but that she has been given more time---possibly a week or two at least. I know that she has a long recovery ahead of her, but I definitely feel more optimistic than I did this morning.


As difficult as this day has been, I have been reminded of the good things in life too. My grandmother's peace of mind is a true testament to her faith in our Lord. I can only pray that when I reach that point in my own life that my faith will bring me peace that passes understanding. I was also reminded of the blessings of family. God gave us these people in our lives to be comfort, our guide posts in this world, and our companions through the ups and downs of life. No matter how far apart you live, or how long it's been since you've seen one another, when one is in need, the family will rally. Early this morning, when my aunt and I were the only two at the hospital, there was a desperate sense of loneliness and fear around us. But, little by little, as the rest of the family trickled in one by one, that fear began to dissipate. Hugs were shared, tears were shed, fond memories were enjoyed. There was a comfort in knowing that even if the worst happened, we would all be there to walk through it together. The Lord has created us to be His hands and feet. We open our arms for hugs and dry tears and offer comfort --- reminders that He is always with us, and will always provide for our needs. 

As I reflect on this day, and watching my grandma wait for the Lord to take her home, and seeing our family rally around her and her condition improve, I can't help but be reminded of Lincoln Brewster's song, Everlasting God. It is one of my all time favorites. The chorus, "Strength will rise as we wait upon the Lord, wait upon the Lord, we will wait upon Lord....." just seems to fit this day so well. My favorite part of this song is, of course, the last verse spoken by Lincoln's young son:

The Lord is the everlasting God,
The creator of all the Earth,
He never grows weak or weary,
No one can measure the depths of His understanding,
He gives power to the weak, and strength to the powerless,
Even youth will become weak and tired,
And young men will fall in exhaustion,
But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength,
They will soar high on wings like eagles,
They will run and not grow weary,
They will walk and not faint.

The words of this song were taken from Isaiah 40:28, and it just truly speaks to my heart tonight. God is always there. Even when we feel tired and helpless, He is there.